Oh Say, Can’t We Hear 

The Worst National Anthem’s Performed

This year’s Home Run Derby at Globe Life Field in Arlington, Texas for the 2024 All-Star festivities was a most memorable one. Not because Los Angeles Dodger underdog Teoscar Hernandez won in dramatic fashion, edging out one of the favorites KC’s Bobby Witt Jr, but because of what we witnessed before the jaw dropping homeruns left the yard.  In fact, I’m not sure the internet junkies even watched the spectacular strength and showmanship of these athletes swinging their lumber after what happened during the “singing” of our National Anthem. 

Following a very high-energy and wonderfully entertaining introduction of the eight Home Run Derby contestants by actor/comedian Marcello Hernández of “Saturday Night Live” fame, country music star, and 4-time Grammy nominated, Ingrid Andress took to the microphone. What happened next was and absolute disaster. But, let’s look back at a couple of other horrendous performances first. 

If you are old enough to remember, which I am, comedian Rosanne Barr once sang the National Anthem in the second leg of a doubleheader baseball game between the San Diego Padres and the Cincinatti Reds. Rosanne was loud and abrasive as a person and her vocals matched her attitude.  With fingers plugged into her own ears (which explained by Barr to account for the audio system’s split-second delay), the boos from a crowd of 25,744 rose, Roseanne screeched and hollered her way through a 53-second, sickening off-key performance of the national anthem. 

That’s not all. 

As she backed away from the mike, Barr grabbed her crotch and then spat. Afterward, she held out her arms, walked toward the dugout and gave a big hug to husband actor/comedian Tom Arnold, who could be heard saying, “Let’s go get the kids and get out of here” as the jeers continued to rain down onto the field.  

Luckily for Rosanne there was no social media back then, but she headlined all the news outlets and newspapers (that was a thing) the next day and was heralded an “Atrocity to America”.  But what did you expect when you signed Rosanne Barr up to sing the National Anthem? 

Then there was Fergie. At least she was and actual performer and globally recognized singer.  However, she is still considered by many to be the worst national anthem performance ever. The former Black Eyed Peas member, and then solo artist, took a different approach when it came to her rendition at the 2018 NBA All-Star Game.  She decided to change the format a bit and not sing the song in classic style but rather put her own spin on it and I assume jazz it up a bit.  Wrong move.  She presented a breathy, slowed down version that came off as poorly bluesy and certainly out of place.  The faces of the NBA players as she crawled her way through this awful presentation were absolutely hilarious and became the focal points of internet memes. Late night talk show hosts needed not to write monologues, because she served up all the jokes for them. 

There have been others too that choked at the occasion.  Olympic gold medalist Carl Lewis attempted to sing the national anthem before a Chicago Bulls vs New Jersey Nets game in 1993. His performance was marked by a deluge of missed notes and an awkward mid-song apology on how it was going, making it a particularly cringeworthy experience for those in attendance and watching on TV.  Michael Jordan’s tongue was out for a different reason this night.  Yuck. However, again, not a singer and I’m not sure how he got there.  Perhaps, he was attempting to start a singing career?  If that was the case, his notions in that field were much shorter than his long jump. 

Christina Aguilera, with her powerhouse range and stunningly beautiful voice could totally crush “The Star-Spangled Banner”, right?!  Well, she tried at the 2011 Super Bowl, and it didn’t go as planned. Aguilera literally changed the words in the song’s fourth line, merging the lyrics with the song’s second line. Her final note was, well, well it was something. 

Last night we may have crowed a new Majesty of Awful Anthem’s.  One to take down all the others.  Ingrid Andress’s rendition was riddled with vocal strain, scratchy notes and her pitch was all over the place, to say the very least. 

Hearing the crowd’s ‘ooh’s’ when Andress failed to reach any of the higher notes in ‘Flag was still there’ should be enough blowback one might need that they shouldn’t keep trying to reach that plateau. However, she did try it one more time in ‘Land of the free’ and it sounds so bad that I was wanting to hear nailed running down a chalkboard so that I could get a reprieve from this jarring sound.  I wanted to mute the television at one point, but the rubber necking part of me, that longs to see the car crash, wouldn’t allow it. Even Philadelphia Phillies All-Star, Alec Bohm, couldn’t keep a straight face. He could be seen trying to politely hold back his laughter, but that was an impossible task.  By the end, the crowd seemed to be stunned by what they had heard and offered little applause.  Unlike the uproar one would normally hear after the singing of the national anthem.  And the social media, well it was harsh: 

Also, I’d be remiss if I didn’t drop that link here. She has turned off her notifications on Social Platforms and has limited her access for comments as well. My only concern, is that maybe she was under the influence of something. If that’s the case I hope she gets any help that she needs. And I’ll gladly jump Fergie back up to the one spot.